"If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear." ~ A.A. Milne
If we had time and no money, living by our wits, what story would you tell? ~ Adrienne Rich
"If" is the motto of the dilettante/And idle dreamer; 'tis the poor excuse/Of mediocrity. ~ Ella Wheeler Wilcox
If particular care and attention is not paid to the ladies, we are determined to foment a rebellion and will not hold ourselves bound by any laws in which we have no voice or representation. ~ Abigail Adams
If you want a place in the sun, you've got to put up with a few blisters. ~ Abigail Van Buren
If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. ~ Abraham Lincoln
If we value the pursuit of knowledge, we must be free to follow wherever that search may lead us. The free mind is no barking dog to be tethered on a 10 foot chain. ~ Adlai Stevenson
If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed. ~ Albert Einstein
If you are a friend, why do you bite me so hard? If an enemy, why do you fawn on me? ~ Aesop's Fables
If you make the customer smile, he'll come back to you. ~ Alan Bagliore
If you don't mind me asking, what's this poisonous cobra doin' in my underwear drawer? ~ Weird Al Yankovic